Kimmel Mocks Pete Hegseth’s Rumored Pentagon Makeup Studio

Welcome to Best of Late Night, a rundown of the previous night’s highlights that lets you sleep — and lets us get paid to watch comedy. Here are the 50 best movies on Netflix right now.

All Dolled Up

Pete Hegseth denied reports this week that he requested a makeup studio built at the Pentagon to prepare for television interviews.

On Thursday, Jimmy Kimmel said Americans wouldn’t even recognize the former secretary of defense, as opposed to Hegseth, who “is on TV now more than Ryan Seacrest.”

“This is Lloyd Austin, he is a four-star general. He was the previous secretary of defense. You ever seen him before? No. You know why? He was inside the Pentagon doing his job — he was not on TV.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“He has strongly denied this. He called it a ‘totally fake story,’ and a Defense Department official added that — he said it makes no sense because Pete does his own makeup, which is more embarrassing.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“I don’t know why he would be ashamed of this. A lot of warriors wear makeup. You ever see Mel Gibson in ‘Braveheart’? He’s got it all over.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“Nothing sparks fear in the hearts of our enemies like a defense secretary who puts foundation on his face and a big palm full of Suavecito Pomade in his hair every day. It’s the warrior ethos.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“The defense secretary has a makeup room, the vice president wears eyeliner, and yet somehow this administration spends all day, every day complaining about trans women ruining sports.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

The Punchiest Punchlines (Take Your Kid to Work Day Edition)

“So today was Take Your Kids to Work Day, which I admit I misunderstood — I didn’t know it had to be my kid.” — GREG GUTFELD

“It is a day that got started in 1992 as a way for children to learn why their parents are so depressed all the time.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“It used to be Take Your Daughter to Work Day — remember that? — and it encouraged women in the workplace. Then over time it changed to Take Your Son or Daughter to Work. The rule is you have to pay your son 22 percent more than the daughter.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

“At the White House this morning, Elon Musk brought a few of his kids to work — not all of them. He brought him to meet President Trump. See, that’s what happens when you get them wet — they multiply.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

The Bits Worth Watching

The singer Jelly Roll discussed his 200-pound weight loss on Thursday’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live.”

David Bushell’s new documentary, “Cheech and Chong’s Last Movie,” celebrates its stars’ enduring friendship, on-screen and off.